Women's Little Instruction Book
Never do housework. No man ever made love to a women because the house was
spotless. 
Remember you are known by the idiot you accompany. 
Don?t imagine you can change a man unless he?s in diapers. 
What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? Shut the door! 
So many men so many reasons not to sleep with any of them. 
If they put a man on the moon, they should be able to put them all there. 
Tell him you?re not his type you have a pulse. 
Never let your man?s mind wander. It?s too small to be let out alone. 
The only reason men are on this planet is because vibrators can?t dance or 
buy drinks. 
Go for younger men. You might as well. They never mature anyway. 
A man who can dress himself without looking like Forest Gump is
unquestionably gay. 
Men are all the same. They just have different faces so you can tell them
apart. 
Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some
women miserable. 
Women don?t make fools of men. Most of them are the do-it-yourself type. 
The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for
it. 
Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. 
If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital. 
The children of Israel wandered around the desert for years. Even in biblical
times, men wouldn?t ask for directions 
If he asks what sort of books you?re interested in, tell him checkbooks. 
A man?s idea of serious commitment is usually "Oh all right, I?ll stay the
night." 
If he asks you if your faking it tell him no, your just practicing. 
Sadly, all men are created equal 
When he asks you if he?s your first, tell him "you might be, you look
familiar." 
Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and what?s left is
handicapped.