A College Christmas
 
                          Twas the night before finals, 
                          And all through the college, 
                          The students were praying 
                          For last minute knowledge. 
   
                          Most were quite sleepy, 
                          But none touched their beds, 
                          While visions of essays 
                          danced in their heads. 
 
                          Out in the taverns, 
                          A few were still drinking, 
                          And hoping that liquor 
                          would loosen up their thinking. 
 
                          In my own apartment, 
                          I had been pacing, 
                          And dreading exams 
                          I soon would be facing. 
 
                          My roommate was speechless, 
                          His nose in his books, 
                          And my comments to him 
                          Drew unfriendly looks. 
 
                          I drained all the coffee, 
                          And brewed a new pot, 
                          No longer caring 
                          That my nerves were shot. 
 
                          I stared at my notes, 
                          But my thoughts were muddy, 
                          My eyes went ablur, 
                          I just couldn't study. 
 
                          "Some pizza might help," 
                          I said with a shiver, 
                          But each place I called 
                          Refused to deliver. 
 
                          I'd nearly concluded 
                          That life was too cruel, 
                          With futures depending 
                          On grades had in school. 
 
                          When all of a sudden, 
                          Our door opened wide, 
                          And Patron Saint Put It Off 
                          Ambled inside. 
 
                          Her spirit was careless, 
                          Her manner was mellow, 
                          She started to bellow: 
   
                          "What kind of student 
                          Would make such a fuss, 
                          To toss back at teachers 
                          What they tossed at us?" 
 
                          "On Cliff Notes!  On Crib Notes! 
                          On Last Year's Exams! 
                          On Wingit and Slingit, 
                          And Last Minute Crams!" 
 
                          Her message delivered, 
                          She vanished from sight, 
                          But we heard her laughing 
                          Outside in the night. 
 
                          "Your teachers have pegged you, 
                          So just do your best. 
                          Happy Finals to All, 
                          And to All, a good test."